Fixing a broken writer heart

It was more than thirteen years ago when my writer heart was broken the first time. I knew I want it to be a writer since I was twelve, I wrote the first draft of a novel, a lot of poetry, and some short stories. On 1997, my writer heart got broken for the first time, and I simply stop writing.
Took me thirteen years to find my writer heart, there was a close encounter on 1999, when I won a research project on Intellectual Property in Venezuela, but it was too much pain, so I just close the box with the broken writer heart inside and got heads down into business.
Two years ago, I found the old box with my broken writer heart, and decide to fix it. It has been a lot of pain, it has been really painful, and took me almost a year to begin writing constantly again, and when I was feeling great, someone that I really appreciate, and without any wrong intention, broke the not yet fixed writer heart again. For the last two days I had not write anything, I have been with a melancholic song repeat in my head, over and over
I was thinking hard into put my broken writer heart, yes the writer heart that I have been trying to fix for more than two years in the box again and make it disappear, but something has change, I want to make my dream true, I want to see my dream, and even if that means that I need to accumulate all the rejections in the world, and get my writer heart broke many more times, I had no other choice. I try not to be a writer, I try to forget that I am a writer, I put my writer heart far away from my reach, but it came back.
I am not expecting anyone to understand this, I am a writer, I am writer with a broken writer heart, but I am proud to be a writer, I am proud to be sensitive, I am proud to be able to allow my writer to express itself, I am proud to have a writer heart to be broke.
I don’t know how this broken writer heart is going to get fixed, I don’t even know if will get fixed, but even if I need to write from this broken heart, I will, because the alternative is simply more painful.